Now that he's without him
what is he working for
He had never truly realized
His dad drove him to want more
With working came acceptance
replaced emotions he concedes
with his father unavailable,
he kept his schedule filled with deeds,
When his father passed away
it broke him to the core
just learning he and his dad
had things in common they stood for
His dad had loved unconditionally,
despite his character flaws
and perhaps was thinking he'd call his son
when the winter thaws
but winters came and went
and neither reached to call
yet they truly loved each other
despite their voices being awol
His imperfect life with his Dad,
is now the oddest gift he treasures
He's vowed to be a father
for his sons to proudly measure
He says "I love you" to his kids,
and has being saying so for many years
then thinks of what he missed
with his Dad,
and it reduces him to tears
Nothing can make that emptiness go
he carries the lesson learned
Knowing now to speak his love out loud
not said to be returned
When a son loses his father
a part of himself fades into that light
as do the words he rarely stated,
like, "Dad, nice to hear from you tonight"
or picking up the phone to say,
"hi dad, did you just hear",
are calls he wished he'd made
while he wipes away a tear,
Now in a prayer he says, "I love you Dad",
to the heavens he kneels and pleads
and wonders if his fathers knows
that his love's so strong, it bleeds
"Dad, in case you didn't know it,
I love you more than I can say
I always tell my kids I love them
I learned that the hard way,
and in my heart,
my father,
you shall always stay".

Author: Barbara Tremblay Cipak